California’s domestic violence laws apply to all crimes that are committed against one’s child, one’s parent or one’s intimate partner. Intimate partners involved in a same sex relationship are those who are or were civilly united, those who are or were living together, those who are or were dating and those who have children together. There are many different types of domestic abuse that a perpetrator may inflict on his or her victim and emotional abuse is one of the most devastating.

Emotional abuse, also commonly referred to as psychological or verbal abuse, is a type of domestic abuse that, studies suggest, is even more harmful than physical abuse. It is believed to be widely underreported, because it is difficult to identify and/or prove and because it is usually coupled with other types of abuse.

Emotional abuse is perhaps so damaging because it takes the biggest toll on one’s self-esteem, leaving a victim feeling completely unworthy of anything other than an abusive relationship. Emotional abuse occurs when an individual harasses, threatens or intimidates his or her intimate partner or other family member in an effort to gain control over that person. Some common forms of psychological abuse include, but are not limited to, threatening to “out” one’s LGBT intimate partner, mocking, shaming or criticizing another, isolating another from others, blaming another for one’s own violent actions, issuing “blackmail type threats” where an individual threatens to harm or kill him or herself, the intimate partner or their child(ren) and destroying another’s personal property or pets in an effort to invoke fear in that person. When a victim reacts to this type of abuse (often with tears or apologies), the perpetrator will often further mock or ridicule the partner or other family member, which simply leaves the victim feeling even worse.

As difficult as it may be to understand, many victims of emotional intimate partner abuse do not leave their partners. They have been conditioned to believe that they are in a hopeless situation, unworthy of another’s love and perhaps “too stupid” to make it on their own. While being abused, the victim is made to feel like he or she needs his or her abusive partner to survive and once the abuse is over, the abusive partner makes his or her partner believe that it is he or she who can’t bear the thought of losing the abused partner, which is called the honeymoon phase in the cycle of abuse. An emotional abuse victim who doesn’t leave his or her abuser may also suffer from a psychological condition known as “battered person’s syndrome” which serves as an explanation for why he or she suffers and doesn’t flee a destructive relationship. While battered person’s syndrome and the cycle of abuse are primarily applicable to intimate relationships, emotional abuse is not and can be a type of child abuse or elder abuse as well.

People who are repeatedly exposed to emotional abuse, regardless of whether they are adults or children will exhibit certain common symptoms or behaviors as a result. Emotional abuse victims will typically have difficulty trusting others or forming relationships with others, suffer from extremely low self-esteem, may develop serious health problems and are often fearful, anxious and depressed. Children who are the victims of their parent’s emotional abuse will suffer from the above listed symptoms and will likely suffer a host of additional emotional, behavioral, developmental and academic problems. Studies reveal that emotionally abused children often either attempt suicide or commit suicide due to their feelings of worthlessness.

If any of this information sounds familiar, help is available. The GLBT supportive California domestic violence lawyers at the Kavinoky Law Firm can offer legal advice to help a victim of emotional abuse understand what his or her legal options are and can help an individual charged with a domestic abuse crime by providing the most trusted, comprehensive defense possible. Contact them today for a free consultation and for exceptional representation.